The International Buggers never disappoint when it comes to the foreign trips, and whilst I was originally going to call my write up as "Our Trip To Sausageland", I thought it far more fitting to rename it as "Sat Navs and Spam" instead. So grab a Beer and an Aldi Bratwurst, sit back and let me tell you about yet another truly epic trip comprising of much drinking, complete sillyness, first aid, breakdowns, and everyone just generally being a Wally.

This year, our hosts for the Pentecost Weekend (Euro Bank Holiday) were the German Buggy Club in Osnabruk  (49219 Glandorf to be precise)





As with previous years, we try and avoid the Channel Crossing under the pretense that we like the overnight sleep on the Ferry, but if the truth be told, its not that we dislike the French, its just that we really enjoy the Dutch - so sailing to Holland really is the starting point. This year, more and more of you are joining us (17 Buggies Sailing from Harwich), and its great that Davydoff is not traveling alone on the Hull ferry, but now actually has a Northern Contingent keeping him company (7 Buggies Sailing from Hull).

Once docked in Holland, the drive to Osnabruk is only about 200 miles (well it should have been) and after allowing for some cruising and exploration, we did around 550 to 600 miles Sausage side, with fuel prices being about the same there as here. My own fuel (including a 700 mile return trip from Devon to Harwich via the Midlands) came in at around the £300 mark. This year, I did not break down, but still considered the £40 Breakdown Recovery Insurance from Cherished Vehicle Services to be worth having just in case.

Being regular travelers, we now have a deal with Stenna and the Ferry for a Buggy with 2 people (and a double cabin each way) comes in at around £220 (P&0 from Hull around £50 more) but we do tend to book this around November / December to get these rates. If you want to do an IBW, you really need to get your name down quick, as ferry spaces can be limited - there is always the tunnel if you are a last minute person though.

The camping will be basic - There is always an inclusive food deal available for around 65 Euros a head, and this includes a Breakfast and an Evening Meal. There is usually a food van on site and a bar for drinks. This is great, as you don`t need to drag food with you, although some of us may venture out for a top up of snacks and the odd crate to be consumed around midnight.


From Thursday Morning to Tuesday night, 1300 miles, 2 nights on a Boat, 3 nights under canvas, 3 Countries and a hell of a party for around £850 for both of us seemed really good value, and if you ask anyone that went, they will almost certainly tell you that they have already booked the next one.

And of course, it would not be an IBW trip without one of Chad's fabulous T-Shirt designs





You would be a real Wally if you didn`t join us - and as you will see, most of them did !!

Pre-Trip preparations this year were a bit frantic to say the least. As you know, I rebuilt and killed a brand new engine which after being fixed by Farmer Rob behaved faultlessly ( thanks mate ) much to the annoyance of Oojamaflip whose build was bumped aside whilst mine was being done. He did say that he didn`t mind, even though it was through gritted teeth. Don`t worry Dave, if yours runs even half as nicely as mine did, you will be well chuffed with an engine from Rob.

No, my panic was that the Buggy didn`t get back here until the 7th of May, Lisa was in Hospital on the 15th, and I had an operation on my foot on the 19th - didn`t leave much time to run the engine in for its departure to Germany on the 31st. luckily, we just about managed enough around Cornwall for an oil change before packing the car up.

Then came programming the route into the Nav - My god !!  When did things become so difficult ?

I have been selling Car Sat Navs for 25 Years now, from the first ones that cost £8k and only covered the inside of the M25 up to the video screen navs nowadays that look like you are following a camera. I do like proper car Sat Navs.

What I have a real hatred for though, are these crappy portable Sat Navs that stick on your dash that were designed for Hikers and Bikers as they are really slow and cumbersome and like to recalculate all the time. Still, I guess thats what you get for £150, so hardly surprising really. I picked up a Garmin for the Buggy, downloaded the latest European Software and Lisa frantically grabbed it just before I launched it down the road in disgust.

Enter your Postcode. Simple enough, except that the Europeans do not use the same format postcode as we do, so it had to be done with mapping co-ordinates instead. I know that Ruben had sent over some numbers that many were struggling with, but the European longitude and latitude numbers are slightly different to the degrees, minutes and seconds that we use over here. I knew that, but many didn`t, and it was getting a bit complicated to explain. Go to Google, find where we are going, grab some co-ordinates and try and use those. Garmin, in their infinite wisdom, decided to either round up or round down the last two digits of seconds into a single number, which would actually put you in a slightly different location. You don`t get these sort of problems with a proper car Sat Nav. We programmed in the final destination of Glandorf and figured if we lost the others, then we would simply meet them at the beer tent in Sausageland.

Wednesday Night we were finally packed and ready for an early start knowing that we would be too excited to sleep.





Top Tip for IBW Newbies. Pack your overnight bag on the top so that when you get to the Ferry you can just grab it and run to the bar for a beer whilst others are frantically unpacking their cars and also make sure that your passports and tickets are easily accessible.

The most obvious 320 mile route to Harwich for us is the M5/M4/M25 and yet people wonder why we don`t do it. For 300 miles, we can drive along the south coast ending up on the southern M25, or for 350 miles, we can head North and meet the Midlands lot and cruise across the country on some far better roads.

Thursday morning at 7am, we looked at the weather forecast which seemed fairly good (showed armageddon on Friday night in Germany) so with the roof stowed away, we headed North on the M5. Still running the engine in, we took it fairly steady and it was not long before we had completed the 120 miles to our first fuel stop at St Michaels Mount Services. The trip was uneventful, it was a nice day, Lisa was good, but the same could not be said for the Coffee. I must get the range sorted on my fuel tank so that I can drive another 15 miles past this Starbucks muck in a cup petrol station. Starbucks, the place where they insist on writing your name on a cup so that they can call it out when ready. I did point out that I was not only stood in front of them, but that I was also the only person in the coffee shop. If someone else was that desperate for my Coffee, they would have been more than welcome to it. I only wanted it to warm my hands, the rest went down the drain. Actually, that's untrue, as the sludge in the cup just sat on the top of the open grate and would not pass through it.





By 11:30, we had finally reached Snoopy & Vicki`s house. This was a good moment for me, as it has taken nearly three years to do this trip without my engine complaining at some stage. I do enjoy coming up too see these guys, as not only is their hospitality legendary but Vicki is always baking, and you never know what little home made treats you may end up with. Today was Biscotti - Yum Yum.





Shortly afterwards, we heard the unmistakable sound of another Buggy puling up outside. It was Hugh. I had no idea which of his fleet he would be bringing for this adventure, but I knew that it would be yellow.





Hugh was laughing with Lisa, saying that he felt like he was traveling with Royalty, and whilst Keith was looking for a crown to put on his head, Vicki suddenly had a nervous flashback to the pair of Bowler hats she was wearing a few years back.





Its now mid day, and time to head up the A46 to meet the Midlands Convoy.

Meanwhile, Up North . . . .

Chad and George are having a real Deja Vu moment about setting off on an epic trip





The Midlands Crew were now assembling at Chorley Services.





Kath seemed a little nervous about this trip as it turned out that she had never actually been abroad before.

Don`t worry Kath, there is a first time for everything 

In recent years, the Bridge over the Motorway has always been a great place to stop, and as the Midland crew roll underneath us, we make a frantic dash across all three lanes to join them. Trouble is that there are now three of us and the traffic is considerably heavier this year. Vicki and Lisa were both overheard at the same time to say that they really didn`t like this bit, so Keith made a phone call to the Crew at Chorley to say we would meet them at the next services instead.





But not before Lisa and I had taken the obligatory "Selfie" on the bridge.





Looking back, I was trying to see if Hugh had actually fallen asleep





But if he had, he was certainly awoken by the horns blowing as he shot across the three lanes of the busy junction. We are used to horns sounding as a sign of friendship and acknowledgement, but this blast was a definite Gerroutoffmybleedinway sort of noise.

A few miles down the road found us at our next meeting point of Rothwell Services for a bite to eat.





And it wasn`t long before the Midlands Crew caught up with us for a natter. It was good to see some old friends again. Sandra didn`t appear to be with us this year, and Lee was a little saddened to admit that she had finally gone down on him for the last time - But it did leave me wondering what the Germans would make of this? No Sandra? What were they going to fling around the dance floor this year? We shall just have to wait and find out.





At which point the Oojamathingummywhatchamacallitmobile rolled past, and Kath let us into a little secret.





Kath seemed a little nervous about this trip as it turned out that she had never actually changed money into Euro's before.

Don`t worry Kath, there is a first time for everything 

As we left Rothwell, the traffic was a nightmare - Every lorry in the world had decided to head East on the A14 and it was slowly grinding to a halt. Not sure we helped matters though by having a brilliant cruise through the middle of it.





The Lorry drivers soon put pay to that one though by blocking the roads ahead of us. It was still a much nicer drive than trying to do the M25





And who should come hooning down the outside lane in a Green Buggy? Well, it wasn`t Dave Dream, and for the benefit of his boss who I`m not sure gave him any time off, he didn`t manage to make the trip.

The sun is shining high in the sky as we pull into Fourwentways Services in Cambridgeshire and everybody is just so happy to be here.





We also appear to been joined by another Buggy, or should I say, a "Zip Buggy"





Time for a natter, a coffee, and a leg stretch





Thats what I really like about these trips, there are so many stops and a nice leisurely pace that its not long before we all really know each other.





Vanessa then breaks out the Polishing cloths and gives us all a masterclass in shiney shiney whilst everybody carefully looks on.





Dave C however, has been a little preoccupied . . . . .





And hasn`t spotted the stalker that has been following him for a few miles now





Kath seemed a little nervous about this trip as it turned out that she had never actually been anywhere that spoke Foreign Languages before

Don`t worry Kath, there is a first time for everything 

Meanwhile, Further Up North

Team Scotland have met up and are now heading south to join the Northern Crew





The Northern Crew are assembling together for the Hull Ferry, and its great to see that Davydoff has some playmates this year. He used to travel over with John and Mags, but now that they have relocated to Sweden he has been a little lonely.





And word has come through that they are safely boarded on the ferry, and heading towards the bar.







Safe Journey Guys and Girls - see you tomorrow in Holland 

Once we had left the busy main roads, the late afternoon cruise down to Colchester was really pleasant, taking us through a very nice part of the country.





Those with Sat Navs have set them to the Postcode shown on the Pizza Hut website which is now guiding us towards the grounds of Colchester Hospital. We later found out that Pizza Hut actually have the wrong postcode listed. We have now hit the entrance to the Hospital car park right on the rush hour of shift change and the staff do not seem that happy to have a dozen or so Buggies all trying to do a U-Turn in front of them.

Some frantic Sat Nav programming is then underway and I recalled that a short while back we passed a large advertising sign for a retail park, so headed back for that. The Sat Nav showed a large area to the right of this sign, so I took the lead only to find that we were now heading back towards the Hospital. Bugger. Another U-Turn.

Big GP was now sat outside the Pizza Hut like Billy No Mates wondering where we all were.





Eventually, the half dozen Sat Nav equipped Buggies arrived at our destination - but not until we had asked a passer by for directions !!

Gary didn`t have to wait long though before we all managed to find the retail Park Entrance and join him.





With 17 Buggies now parked up, it was time to think about some food. We had Pizza Hut on one side, and Subway on the other - and a fair number went to each.





Running this forum can certainly be challenging at times, but there is nothing that gives me more of a buzz when I see old friendships reacquainted





And new ones being made. Hang on a minute . . .  Sparkly Green Buggy, Slot Alloys, LED Headlights . . . . And it isn`t mine 





Yes, I said the word "Sparkly" there, and that is like a red rag to a bull. In Colchester, if you say the words Sparkly, Bling, Polished, or anything similar to describe a Buggy, then someone`s ears will be burning and sure enough, it wasn`t long before our good mate Clem turned up to show us what Sparkly, Bling and Polished actually mean. There are some seriously stunning looking Buggies about these days, but Clem`s is in a league of its own.





Even Kath was lost for words, (and I get the feeling that doesn`t happen often  )





With full bellies, it was now time to go in search of some fuel. Although the Petrol Station was in sight (just behind Pizza Hut) for some reason my Sat Nav still insisted on a couple of circuits of the car park before we left.













After filling up with fuel, my Sat Nav is still telling me to do a U-Turn - Bloody thing !





As Clem has no Sat Nav fitted, and knows this area fairly well, we decided to let him lead the 18 Buggy Convoy over to Harwich





Flags pulled over and appeared to have lost a fan belt.

Once the docks had been reached we said farewell to Clem, who only came down to say hello.

We start to arrive in the Port Car Park, and as always, this is a good place to regroup so that we all go through the Passport Control together.





Imagine a picture in your head of mans best friend - something very bouncy, very happy, tongue hanging out and a soppy wet grin no matter what - Well, we have one of those in our troop, and I swear if he had a tail it would be wagging furiously. No, I don`t think Mark enjoyed any part of this trip whatsoever as you can tell from this picture.





Now is a good time to dig out those tickets and passports, whilst we line up in the evening sun







Snoopy and Dave C add some black tape to the headlights to act as beam adjusters for driving on the wrong side of the road





Flags (and Brother in Law Tim) have just arrived, new belt fitted and a thumbs up to go.





Dave Doon, (Wearing his nice new Yellow BBi Fleece - shameless plug, but I need to pay for this trip somehow) is quick to point out that there is a Murphys Red waiting for him over there on the boat.





And with that, we are now off to the main gate and to Passport control - Hudge is on best behavior here and has even fitted Baffles 





Lisa is just grinning from ear to ear. It has been quite a challenge getting both the Buggy and her here this year, and so far I have succeeded.





Going through Passport Control together means that we all go onto the boat together too.





We have finally worked out why Andy Robinson doesn`t come on these trips. Its nothing to do with not having a passport, its because he is fearful of having to sell his house to fund it. Big GP and I are laughing our heads off though as that tin just ain`t gonna be big enough for the sleepless night on the ferry, let alone the whole weekend.




Anxiety is now setting in, as we are wasting valuable drinking time.





Kath seemed a little nervous about this trip as it turned out that she had never actually been on a Ferry before

Don`t worry Kath, there is a first time for everything 

The sun is starting to set now as we head onto the Boat. Stenna operate two boats on this route, this one is the Hollandica, and is identical to its sister ship with the exception of the staff. Most of the staff on this one are actually Dutch, and they are really nice people.





The cars are now parked on Car Deck 4, which means a long walk up the stairs to Deck 10 where the cabins are.





Lisa didn`t want to take her walking stick for this bit, as there are lots of rails to hang on to. If the 10 floors of stairs was not enough, having cabin 201 at the far end of this corridor nearly saw the death of me





But she made it right to the end without falling over - and was very pleased with herself.





That deserved a drink, so we headed down to the Lounge Bar for a quick nightcap - mindful of the fact that it was a very early start in the morning, and the clocks had shifted by an hour in the wrong direction for a lie in.





Kath seemed a little nervous about this trip as it turned out that she had never actually been Sea Sick before

Don`t worry Kath, there is a first time for everything 





However, I`m not sure that I would have washed down those seasick tablets with all that beer and wine 

5:30 in the morning, and the frequent travelers will now be waiting for the whistling tune coming through the cabin tanoy followed by the song "Don`t Worry, Be Happy" and laughing to themselves about those that did a late night session in the bar last night without realizing just how early we have to get up.

Gary has brought some bad habits with him - mobile phone in one hand and steering wheel in the other





Its a little after 6am on Friday Morning, and I thought I would wander down to the Stern (the blunt end, or rear) of the Boat for a little peek outside. I overheard from someone that the Boat was only partially loaded with 350 Lorries on this trip, and that they usually have a lot more.





The sky is blue, and its going to be a beautiful day - shame the same can not be said for "Picturesque Holland" in front of us, as it does always look somewhat industrial. Its a very pretty country though, once you get past this bit.





Now the bit I really don`t like - Running the Gauntlet. What you see in front of you is a nice big open deck area with maybe 50 or so people in the early morning sun. It should be a nice fresh airy sort of place to be, but trust me, it isn`t. Now, I`m not a smoker and not over fussed about those that are providing you don`t stand next to me blowing smoke in my ears - but in fairness, most of the UK are blowing Cherry Bubbles from their E-Cigs these days so its just feels like standing in a sweet shop. No, these people are Europeans and they do not do the electronics. They refuse to smoke anything other than rolled up turds, and my god, you really cannot begin to imagine the bottom watering stench here that I now have to run through to get back inside.





Time to head up to the pointy end (If I said Bow, you would still be none the wiser) to where breakfast is being served. Behind the glass screen is the main Restaurant where, if you are awake enough, you can get a full blown breakfast for about 15 Euros





But at the end of where we are sitting you can get a coffee and a croissant / roll for around 5 Euros, which is what most of us end up doing.





Sitting in the window with a coffee, watching the world go by, is certainly a great way to start any day





Unless you are Vanessa, who found sitting in a window seat a great way to have your back to it so that you never had to look out of the window





There is a Duty Free shop in the middle of the Boat, but its so expensive it isn't really worth mentioning except to say we walked past it to join the others in the lounge by the steps down to the car deck.





Big GP was still glued to his phone, racking up a huge data bill whilst wondering if he should still be swiping to the left





Parked alongside me was an Audi TT that had a young lady with a very "Yappie" dog. You know the sort Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap - Yap and it tried to empty itself on Alan's rear wheel as we walked back down to the cars. The owner, realizing that we were the car owners, swiftly picked the dog up and bundled it into her car. Hugh (the perfect Gentleman as always) politely knocked on the young drivers window just to warn her that we may spook the dog with the noise of starting up. It was a very nice thing for him to have done. Trouble was, I was going to take one for Alan by hoping it crapped over the car seat when I hit my starter button.

In the queue coming in, was a very pretty little Alfa Romeo. You can just see it in front on the right. Not exactly sure of the model, but it was born of the 60's when there were some very distinctive cars about. It was born of a time where you could have fitted a standard classic Mini inside of it, unlike the Monster Mini Clubman sitting behind it that had been on the pies and could now have devoured the Italian car whole. How times have changed.





Alan is now programming his Sat Nav for the next leg - No point mate, it will only end in tears.





Off the Boat and down to Passport Control





Perfect Beach Buggy Weather, and its only 8:30 in the morning !!





Sat Nav shows a Car Park just outside on the right, which is a good place for us to regroup

As we hit the first bit of Dutch Tarmac, you could hear all of these Sat Navs simultaneously saying Turn Right, and we could see a big empty car park along with an entrance to it. The trouble was, that entrance was actually an exit, so I am proud to say that within 5o feet of being on foreign soil, most us us had just broken the law and turned in.





We then found out very quickly that this was not actually a car park, but it was the Bus Station and some very quick U-Turns were called for.





Whether or not you can understand the road signs or not, Zig Zag lines on the floor universally mean Bugger Off and we all agreed that the Bus Station and Taxi rank were probably not the best place for us to congregate.





Someone spotted that on the other side of this fence was the Bus Station Car Park, which we should now head for. Sat Nav has done it again. Yes, we needed a right turn, but not for another 100 yards.

This time, we pulled into the correct car park





Where Hudge immediately started tearing up the grass much to the annoyance of the locals looking on





Time for a group discussion.

Usually we would all try and stick together, and that way if there is a problem we are all there to help - safety in numbers and all that. This time, it was decided (not by me I might add) that we should separate into smaller groups that would be easier to manage. The way the Sat Nav's were misbehaving, this didn`t sound a bad plan.

To me it seemed a real shame though. Cruising is the best part of it for me, cruising is when we are all together, we seldom do more than 50 mph and we seldom travel more than 100 miles between stops. That way, it matters not if you have a small engine, or a small fuel tank, we stay together.

So, we split into groups.

Those with large fuel tanks went with those with small tanks, the newbies went with those that had no sense of direction, the really fast Buggies went with those with the smallest engines, and all those with Sat Nav's went together.

I mean . .  What could possibly go wrong ?